You may have been shocked to look at our page and discover that Tony Danza recently (April 21 to be precise) celebrated his 50th birthday. Stunned might be a better word, though-stunned that the day passed without much media attention. We admit we were busy most of the day, but we saw nothing on CNN or the network news about it. Correct us if we're wrong, but even E! neglected to cover the occasion with a night of coverage.

As for the glaring lack of Presidential recognition, well, we didn't expect George W. to sing "Happy Birthday" while he was at the free trade summit in Canada. Still, some kind of statement would have been entirely appropriate. This seems to be the biggest example yet of President Bush's minimalist presidency.

Fear not, Danzaholics. Where more "established" news outlets fear to tread, we plow through wearing big goofy galoshes. We are not letting this day go by without a celebration! Read on for all sorts of great Tony Danza material, as we pay tribute to the man that has given us millions of smiles, thousands of laughs, and most importantly, the career of Alyssa Milano.

A Brief History of Tony Danza:

He was born in 1951, had a childhood and became a teenager. During this period, he starred in no sitcoms. However, a show named Taxi hit the airwaves in 1978 and Tony Danza was along for the ride. He was in some bad movies, then was star of long-running ABC hit Who's the Boss?. After several other short-lived series and smaller roles in some other stuff, Danza is back on regular TV in Family Law. He plays a lawyer.

Cultureshark's First Ever Tony Danza Joke: (originally ran in our Fall TV Preview under Family Law)

"Tony Danza joins the cast as a lawyer. I'd rather have a lawyer who works out of a bowling alley. (See Ed)"

Fun Facts about Tony Danza:

• Despite being alive and working in showbiz during the show's entire run, Tony never once appeared on Mama's Family.
• Was Martin Scorcese's first choice as Jake LaMotta in Raging Bull, but it was feared that Danza was such a popular TV icon, audiences would not want to see him in a less sympathetic role.
• Unfortunately, if you try to make an anagram out of "Tony Danza," it's really tough because, well, that "Z" screws everything up.
• Is believed to have set an unofficial word for most times using the "F-word" on network TV in a Saturday Night Live "War of Da Woilds" sketch. It is unofficial because many people believe he was actually saying "funkin'."
• During the era of Tony Danza, the number of boys named "Tony" has not decreased, and by some statistical measures has even gone up slightly.

Famous Tony Danza Quotes:

"Samantha!"
"Angela!"
"Mona!"

Things that Tony Danza is Older Than:

• The Price is Right
• The Honeymooners
• Britney Spears' mom

Things that Tony Danza is younger than:

• Estelle Getty
• The Leaning Tower of Pisa
• The sitcom plot where a guy books two dates for the same evening

Testimonials that actual celebrities would have given if we had actually bothered to contact them:

Michelle Pfeiffer (co-star, Hollywood Nights): I don't put that movie on my resume anymore. But I'm happy for Tony.

Judd Hirsch (co-star, Taxi): Could I talk about Tony Danza? Are you kidding? I LOVE Tony Danza! He's the best! We had some great times back then. Hey, Tony, gimme a call sometime!"

Majandra Delfino (co-star, The Tony Danza Show): Ohmigod! I can't believe he's, like, 50! He was really cool and everything. But you know what, since that show is long gone, everyone should really watch the show I'm on now – Roswell. It's SO cool – if people just give it a chance.

Top 10 Things Tony Danza has done to make the world a better place

1. Did we mention that his show started the career of Alyssa Milano?
2. Courageously led to acceptance of varied gender roles by playing a housekeeper for so many years.
3. Despite breaking his back years ago, still goes out there and gives 100% just to entertain us.
4. Went along with the quick cancellation of Baby Talk giving Scott Baio a chance to join Diagnosis Murder.
5. Police statistics show that crime rates went down 17% in major metropolitan areas on Tuesday nights, 8-8:30, when Who's the Boss aired in that time slot.
6. Portrayal of lovable boxer Tony Banta on Taxi improved the image of boxing, directly leading to the love of Muhammed Ali 20 years later.
7. Tolerant "don't ask, don't tell" attitude towards gay co-star Danny Pintauro led to increased nationwide tolerance of homosexuality.
8. Early work with Michelle Pfeiffer did not scare her out of show business.
9. Never tried to capitalize on his fame with a rap video.
10. His show started the career of Alyssa Milano.

Finally, Ask Not What Tony Danza Can Do For You. He's done so much already. Instead, ask what YOU can do for Tony Danza:

• Send him a birthday card. Just send it to "The Man," c/o CBS. It'll get there.
• Keep watching Family Law every Monday at 10:00 P.M.
• Get Tony on the next season of The Sopranos.
• Memorize this article.
• Get "The Danz" tattooed on your belly.